Week 17 B (the B is for Behave!)

All in fun and when its really not that fun is spell it P-H-U-N.  Its still says “fun” just with four letters.

3 - Stay-positive6So during this week I have been quite unfocused.  However, I did have an operative change in behaviour.  While going through the usual routine of the day at work, I found myself challenged, the way we are all often challenged; by the negativity of others around.

Do you ever encounter those people who genuinely are not satiated, (not “Happy” or “Pleasant”, as that is not possible in their form of normal behaviour), until such time as everyone around them is either angry, unhappy or at their level of demeanour.

Well this week I encountered more than usual, however, it was easy to handle, Because….

I took this blank idea and it bounced around in my head, even during my “sit” that morning.  Although I was unsure why, it came in a round about way later in the day.  I had, had another encounter with a negative ninny who could find nothing right with anything.  This was a conversation I was not enjoying, but was physically trapped in a line up with them.  An opportunity to speak with another person presented itself and I took the opportunity to exit this dark conversation I was involved in by excusing myself as i stated there was a pressing need to speak with the other person.  So off I go to speak to the other person.

This lady I know to frankly be positive, even in the face of immense pressure.  I truly had nothing to say to her and there was no pressing need, so as I walk over, we exchanged the usual pleasantries and it came to me.   BAM! (I really just wanted to use that, thanks Mark J).  I thanked her her always positive demeanour and her ability to bring a smile overtime we talk.  She was quite happy and thanked me for the kind compliment and expressed genuine gratitude.  She told me that no one has told her that and it was appreciated.

2 - a33634a02daf706b6368804192cc8882So for the rest of this week I have greeted those who have a lees than positive behaviour with my new tool.  Each time I was able to find the opportunity to not find fault but “Kill em with Kindness“, so to speak.  I decided to not stoop or bend my behaviour and to find something they had done to make my life or job easier and thank them for it.  I have to admit, it was really quite a lot of fun (for me).  If the conversation or person was to much for me, or involved to many people / dynamics, I just excused myself, sought out a  person I know and thanked them for something they’ve done.  So easy, and so great to the positive mindset.  Even the teller at the bank, super busy, long line and i thanked her for putting up with us, her response was simply amazing.

I am proud to say that I did not succumb to old habits and give them negative people the what for and how to and successfully used this all week.

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Week 17 – What is “The Hero’s Journey”?

For all of us there is always a burning desire that leads us.  I think it’s fair to say that at different phases in our life, that deep burning desire has changed from time to time.  So as we grow, learn, we make choices on this path of life.  We have had great successes and some not so successful learning moments.  Not knowing which is which would present a topic I would not be able to describe easily in this forum so I’m going to leave it with you if that the case.  If not read on.

Each of us has made decisions to complete a task, a life aspiration, or achieve a certain plateau in life by reason of need or sheer desire to stretch / (strain), our potential until it cries for mercy, (loosely paraphrased from Og Mandino’s “The Greatest Salesman in the World” ).

But the real question is why are we so driven to take this task on?

That question most will go through and complete the task without really ever identifying, the why? The how? or What the steps were so I can guide myself or others to so the same.  This last part of the last statement is what is most import to the business person who wants to duplicate their efforts in order to grow the potential of their business through the strength of others.  So I will be pulling quoted material from other sources who have I think explained this process far better than I would, or at least far more concisely.

A book was written that I think best describes the process I would like to discuss.  Joseph Campbell wrote a book called “A Hero with a Thousand Faces”. The book is about self-actualization and it has a approach that applies to everyone.

It’s mostly written with the analogy about myths and mythology and history of storys as experienced through different cultures and what they had in common, rather than what they didn’t. Campbell found a single story-telling pattern; however, the lessons in this book helps us identify and navigate the paths we take to better ourselves and the changes we experience in our lives.

If you want to get better at navigating change, as most of us struggle with these changes, learn what the “Hero’s journey” is. (Click on the Hyperlink here)

Campbell called this universal pattern the monomyth. The monomyth, or as we are learning it “THE HEROS JOURNEY”, (I like this title way more), it is basically every story you’ve ever heard, most of the movies you’ve ever seen — and it is present in all our lives.  I know as I learn to understand it, and master it, I will become a better person.

The video  I have attached is a retelling of the Hero’s journey and how it is used in modern Movie making. (but its really entertaining.  I’m sure its been seen by some; if you like it send it around, better yet send my blog post out to friends and friends of friends!)

The steps as outlined by Campbell:

The 12 Stages of The Hero’s Journey

1. Ordinary World:

This is where the Hero’s exists before his present story begins, their everyday life.

2. Call To Adventure

The Hero’s adventure begins when he receives a call to action; imply a phone call or conversation but whatever the call is.

3. Refusal Of The Call

Although the Hero may be eager to accept the quest, at this stage he will have fears that need overcoming. Second thoughts or even deep personal doubts as to whether or not he is up to the challenge. When this happens, the Hero will refuse the call and as a result may suffer somehow. (usually for most of us, it is loss something or financial challenges)

4. Meeting The Mentor

At this crucial turning point where the Hero desperately needs guidance he meets a mentor figure who gives him something he needs.

5. Crossing The Threshold

The Hero is now ready to act upon his call to adventure and truly begin his quest, whether it be physical, spiritual or emotional; either way he finally crosses the threshold between the world he is familiar with and that which he is not.

6. Tests, Allies, Enemies

Now finally out of his comfort zone the Hero is confronted with an ever more difficult series of challenges that test him in a variety of ways. Obstacles are thrown across his path; whether they be physical hurdles or people bent on thwarting his progress, the Hero must overcome each challenge he is presented with on the journey towards his ultimate goal.  The Hero needs to find out who can be trusted and who can’t.

7. Approach To The Inmost Cave

The inmost cave may represent many things in the Hero’s story such as an actual location in which lies a terrible danger or an inner conflict which up until now the Hero has not had to face.

8. Ordeal

The Supreme Ordeal is a test or a deep inner crisis that the Hero must face in order to survive.

9. Reward (Seizing The Sword)

After defeating the enemy and finally overcoming his greatest personal challenge, the Hero is ultimately transformed into a new state, emerging from battle as a stronger person and often with a prize.

10. The Road Back

This stage in the Hero’s journey represents a reverse echo of the Call to Adventure in which the Hero had to cross the first threshold.

11. Resurrection

This is the climax in which the Hero must have his final and most dangerous encounter with death (figuratively, in our world). For the business type, did the business survive profitably.  The final battle also represents something far greater than the Hero’s own existence with its outcome having far-reaching consequences to his Ordinary World and the lives of those he left behind

12. Return With The Elixir

This is the final stage of the Hero’s journey in which he returns home to his Ordinary World a changed man. He will have grown as a person, learned many things.  His return may bring fresh hope to those he left behind, a direct solution to their problems or perhaps a new perspective for everyone to consider.

A little dramatic description I will admit, but reading this gives me a great cathartic exhale, I think I’m finally able to kinda get it.  🙂

The Seven Characters:

  1. The Hero
  2. The Herald
  3. Mentor
  4. Threshold Guardians
  5. Trickster
  6. Shape-Shifter
  7. Shadow

If you’re a reader, I encourage you to read the book, go to the public library and borrow it, its free and you then a motivation to read it, because its due back in a week or two.  If your like me, pick a favourite movie, watch it again a note the “Hero’s Journey” the protagonist goes through.  Try to identify the different characters and if your competitive, (I know some of your are), make a contest with a simple wager (like a coffee), with a friend to see who can do it better.

Now that you know and are familiar with the steps in the “Hero’s Journey”, go and “sit”, think about your burning desire and try to find the characters in your life; where you are in your “Hero’s Journey”.  When you know where you are, and where you want to go, the choices are yours to make.  Make your success your destiny!

mythicstructure

 

Week 16 – Goals Refocused & Changes

Compass on MapWhile I have spent some time focusing on the architecture of the words I use, sometimes I can miss the reality of what has occurred.  It took the influence of someone outside of my direct environment to give a hint and my willingness to be open to literally do what has been asked to find a simple reality.  So my story this week is really not that focused on defining my words, rather redefining the clarity of the ‘Vitality of Thoughts’ (Words I use for clarity, to define my goals within my DMP in this case).

Last Saturday the universe conspired to prevent me from attending a conference I want to attend, or so I thought.  I have some clear priorities in this life of mine:  Spirituality, Family Business, would be the major ones , (and in very much that order).  [Thank you to my Motorcycle accident a few years back for really clarifying those].Change secret

So due to some unforeseeable circumstances, I needed to be there to get my boys to and from soccer games.  (For me their ability to participate in team events and to learn the value of team building and the responsibility of being part of a team while leading the participation is a key responsibility.  I should also state that I volunteer and coach so I can model that behavior while gaining so much more as a person).

So some events transpired that opened up my later afternoon, with a quick stop at home and change of clothes I was off to the conference.  I arrived in time to hear the keynote speaker.  This was great, it was like getting the ice cream without having to eat the rubber chicken dinner.  As it turns out, using a little ‘Law of Substitution’ when things changed, I learned a quick lesson, the universe did not conspire against me, it simply challenged me to see if I could stick to my priorities, (if you will to see if in fact these are my priorities), and then to see if I could use the skills we have learned to find the new path. (New Blueprint)

Change-Quote 10 yearsSo back to the top and the keynote speaker had said part of growth is knowing where you’re at; and we can always put in place systems and manners of review to do just that.  Rather than sitting around and being less than participative, after the first part of the talk,…DO IT NOW, DO IT NOW, DO IT NOW (sound familiar to anyone).  I decided to take a person plunge and I was reviewing some of my business production to challenge myself against myself to see where I was at.  As it turned out I was blown away… I had achieved top production across the country for the previous month.  This is a goal I had set as a stretch of my potential that I was not truly confident I would achieve.  Although this was not my focus to achieve this goal last month, my focus was simply to get active in my business.  ACTION big word!  It was not until a few moments later that I realized… BAM… this had been a focus statement of my DMP and I had hit it 19 months in advance.  WOW!  So exciting. I can’t really tell you how great that felt, how awe inspiring.  Change secret

The idea of changing this goal never occurred to me, however, re-clarify this goal to encompass a future growth goal while completed the same idea to be the top producer in the country became the new focus.  IF you will clarity in words and a redefined goals to give even more.  The biggest part is with the inspiration of what occurred, to reach this new plateau seems not only reasonable, it is going to happen, of this I have no doubt.

ChangeFuture or Past what’s you’re choice?

Week 15 – Words & Synergy

Words are once again key in my focus.  My “Sits” this week bought a recurring thought to the surface.  In different ways and different forms I was focused on past practices, not old Blueprint, but past successful behaviours based on clearly worded phrases or most cases commands and direction.  Why this was so successful? How did the repetitive behaviours create clear thought in times of crisis, (obstacles)?  What significance did the clarity of the words used have to the overall success of the tasks?  How do I recreate this clarity for the tasks I form today?

As those who have read my blog, or know me from the past; I spent a great deal of time “In the Service”.  Military, Law Enforcement and Fire Fighting.  What do these forms of service have in common with my current journey, maybe nothing, however, maybe too much.

images-2You have to look into the value of the words used to accomplish the tasks or outcomes desired.  That for me was a ‘key’ discovery.  In each of these societal forms of ‘Service’ I mentioned above, certain traits and disciplines are common throughout.  There are many, but a good few to start with are listed below.  The fact that these are ‘Regimented’ environments, they required ‘Faith’ in the leadership, Faith in the ‘Words of Command’ (both giving and receiving), ‘Discipline’ and Confidence as well as an understanding that small incremental steps are needed in each level of growth to increase the value of the whole, a ‘Synergy’ of self if you will.  ‘Decisiveness’ to carry out all the mentioned words.

So as I believe and Haanel talks to in paragraph 15 -20, “…words and sentences are the highest form of architecture in civilization…”.  Lets define some of these ideas / words from above.

regimentex_coelis

verb (used with object)
3.  to manage or treat in a rigid, uniform manner; subject to strict discipline.

faith

noun
1.  confidence or trust in a person or thing:
2.  belief that is not based on proof:
3.  belief in God (the Universal Mind) or in the doctrines or teachings of
4.  belief in anything, as a code of ethics, standards of merit, etc.:
6.  the obligation of loyalty or fidelity to a person, promise, engagement,etc.:

7.  the observance of this obligation; fidelity to one’s promise, oath,allegiance, etc.:

command

verb
2. be in a strong enough position to have or secure (something).

discipline

noun
1.  training to act in accordance with rules;

2.  activity, exercise, or a regimen that develops or improves a skill;training:
5.  behavior in accord with rules of conduct; behavior and order maintained by training
6.  a set or system of rules and regulations.

decisive

adjective
1.  having the power or quality of decidingputting an end to controversy; crucial or most important:
2.  characterized by or displaying no or little hesitation; resolute;determined:
3.  indisputable; definite:
4.  unsurpassable; commanding:

synergy

nounplural synergies.
1.  the interaction of elements that when combined produce a total effect that is greater than the sum of the individual elements, contributions,etc.;

 

e17eef836385895a89978f9a2c5f8ec5-2So how do these words fit, I believe in knowing the meaning of the word, you begin to understand it’s use and the usefulness it gives to the eloquent clarity of the Definitenes of Purpose we aim to guide ourselves to in this journey.

Haanel goes on to to speak in 15-21. Words are thoughts and are therefore an invisible and invincible power which will finally objectify themselves in the form they are given.  So if we are not giving the correct form to the words we use the wrong word.  The reality is we may not attract the intended result; only the result which we have ‘asked’ for.  What would you rather have, chosen the correct words, or the just floated through accepting what comes to you?

Haanel goes on to speak to this again in 15-22. Words may become mental palaces that will live for ever, or they may become shanties which the first breeze will carry away… .  Haanel continues to describe that the word consists in the beauty of the thought and the power off the thought, describing the details in 15-23 to 28; he closes this series with the understanding that the Law of Compensation with regard to the idea of energy.  15-29. In the physical world there is a law of compensation which is that “the appearance of a given amount of energy anywhere means the disappearance of the same amount somewhere else,” and so we find that we can get only what we give; if we pledge ourselves to a certain action we must be prepared to assume the responsibility for the development of that action. The sub-conscious cannot reason. It takes us at our word; we have asked for something; we are now to receive it; we have made our bed, we are now to lie on it; the die has been cast; the threads will carry out the pattern we have made.

It is here where the critical juncture occurred for me, where the past ‘Training’ met my need today.  Within me i learned quickly that the training first instilled in me as a young soldier was the understanding that constant repetition of a task created the ‘sub-conscious’ reaction.  We train and train and train on a singular focus to achieve an ‘autonomic response mechanism’ that is both efficient and accurate.  These are usually based on a singular ‘Word or Phrase of Command’.  This has not been developed overnight; however, through hundreds of years of learned and experienced practice.  Hence the ‘Regimented’ behaviour that is instilled through discipline and reaffirm through self-discipline.  For this process to work effectively, one must have faith that the end result will come to fruition based on the belief that the command is secure and just.  Without these two aspects, the Faith can not exist.  Surprisingly once instilled these behaviours are often lifelong.  This is a key factor to my understanding of the clarity of the words used and the strength gained through the repetition.  As well how the development of these processes grows and is added to as the environment changes and the position of the individual changes.  Through all the years the basics are never changed, for to do this would lead to the chaos of confusion and inharmony. Another key.

insight into the thought is critical prior to instilling it into the universe.  It is in the insight that the ability to achieve clarity and to understand the difficulties and possibilities of any undertaking.  It prepares us for the obstacles we shall meet, turns our thought and attention to the right directions.  Most of all, insight is a product of the world within.  It is developed in the Silence, by concentration.

During my initial leadership development in the military, day 1 in fact, all candidates were greeted with a required essay, to write 450 – 500 words concisely on a single word – SYNERGY.   (By the way essay writing is not something taught in basic training or basic officer training and are not generally considered military skills).  However, the military are sticklers for words, words are key.  We were required to do this writing  without the assistance of books nor phone a friend, we were confined to the barracks and this was 1990 so no smart phones or computers either.  Several skills were taught quickly with this task, it forced us, a diverse group from across the country, most who you have never met before, to work together.  First define the word, understand the intent of the exercise and write clearly a descriptive narrative on this word and how it applies to both the Military and Leadership.

c2255add0872a22723e2f7843f4aa6e0So once agin, back to the words.  All these parts, (words), alone are not sufficient to complete any undertaking successfully; however the sum of the parts is greater than the whole – SYNERGY!

Week 14 – Thought & Spiritual Activity

 

dagher-abundance

Harmony – What a wonderful word.  Just saying it evokes so many positive attributes and thoughts.  harmony

harmony

nounplural harmonies.
1. agreement; accord; harmonious relations.
2. a consistent, orderly, or pleasing arrangement of parts; congruity.
4. an arrangement of the contents of the Gospels, either of all four or of the first three,   designed to show their parallelism, mutual relations,and differences.
SynonymsExpand
1. concord, unity, peace, amity, friendship. 2. consonance, conformity, correspondence, consistency. See symmetry.
Even the synonyms for Harmony are great.
Harmony is a large part of my DMP, and it is in this reading this week where i noticed this word standing out for whatever reason.  I thought I really want to think on this word and manifesting it into my life with much more prevalence, and as 14-31 states, the exercise this week was to sit and concentrate on ‘Harmony’.  So grateful for this.  It was not only something I needed to do, it is something a very much want to expand on in my life.
Harmony comes in so many forms and so many styles.  I have had the pleasure of serving on many high preforming teams in my various roles in life.  Harmony was always the key factor, the glue that allowed these teams to preform as well as they did.
2 - a33634a02daf706b6368804192cc8882
However, struggles can always arise, and with it comes ‘Disharmony’.

disharmony

nounplural disharmonies.
1. lack of harmonydiscord.
2. something discordant.
It is the Lack of understanding that that determines the strength given to disharmony.  So I find it very important that inorder to understand Harmony, I must also understand how to recognize it very real and very opposite partner.  With this I found that realizing the PT’s (Psychological Triggers) that create for me / in me the discord, was a very real part of the SITS.  I had to realize that for me to better my ability to be Harmonious, I need to control the reaction(s) I have to those who would wish to create Disharmony.
As well the title, the idea of thought and spirituality is critical to this endeavour.  I will …”Learn to keep the door shut, keep out of your mind and out of your world, every element that seeks admittance with no helpful end in view.”   — George Mathew Adams
abundance-saying
Just a short blog on this, I wish for Abundance and Harmony to all of you for 2016!

Week 13 – The Habits We Have – the Light or the Darkness – Your Choice

Dale-Carnegie-Habits-Quotes

Our Habits and the Human equation starts with the fact that we are attune to the negative bias.  This is not a matter for discussion but reality that we must acknowledge in order to set forth the HABIT of changing this bias by replacing the initial thought with one of the positive bias.

So if we take the “Seven Laws of the Mind” into account  we will have the framework of the process by which we can win this daily battle to succeed in change.  I have added 4 of these laws that apply to this blog today, for the sake of explanation.

3 - Stay-positive6Law of Substitution:  We cannot think about 2 things at the same time. If a negative thought enters your mind ~ try to think about any fond memory or other pleasant thought. 

Law of Practice:  Practice makes perfect. The 5Ps – Perfect Practice Prevents Poor Performance. Our bewilderment of magnificence in others, upon further inspection, finds…as Wooden shares ‘you’ll find most of it is practice, the rest of it is work.’ With practice of the correct things, we improve ~ on the other 6 Laws of the Mind.

Law of Dual Thought:  Thought is a combination of ideation and feeling. We can attach any feeling to a thought we want.

Law of Growth:  Whatever we think about grows. What we forget atrophies.

Last week was a tough week for me as I was going through a negative memory period.  Dealing with things I thought I had dealt with and put to bed log ago.  Turns out not so much.  So these laws I mentioned above can work in both directions; positive thought or negative thought; we must chose how we apply them.

I had to decide – persist if you will – on what is the real issue.  So I took it to my SITS and did not get a clear resolution, but I did get a clear understanding of what was creating the turmoil, and it was my old blueprint.  I took this dilemma and shared it with a trusted friend and , truly an MMA partner, we tossed around these issues and discussed some of the facts while we discussed this the new blueprint really did start to come to my rescue, it was easy to find the positive stance and lift this imagined weight off of me.  For me it was amazing to have struggled through cognitively acknowledging the experience for what it is and forming the final decision that these experiences need not reflect in the mirror of my future as each experience had with it a positive benefit.  I either learned something or got to share time with people I cared for before they were gone, seeing them always in their best light.

I am glad that rather than forget these experiences and move on, I was able to use the Laws and my MMA (Mastermind Alliance), to solidify my renewed blueprint, and realize that perhaps this struggle was the last death roll of my old blueprint.

What i can add to this is that i know – I PERSIST – I WIN.

Week 12 – Eternal Vigilance

TarasJadeBuddha

I love this photo because my three golden bhudda’s are my children.  I can only imagine how what I am learning and teaching them through the change in me will influence them to be positive daring and faithful persons, not to be stifled by the negative oppressive behaviours of i others.

I hear not those who weep and complain, for their disease is contagious….

Og Mandino

As i read Haanel’s Part 12, I am inspired by paragraph 4-12:

4. The only way to keep from going backward is to keep going forward. Eternal vigilance is the price of success. There are three steps, and each one is absolutely essential. You must first have the knowledge of your power; second, the courage to dare; third, the faith to do.

I persist and I succeed – When this is put together it with Haanel’s teaching’s, it creates something awesome and if you have faith in yourself and belief in the new you – unstoppable.

So I continue to go forward with Eternal Vigilance; with the faith that I create and manifest my future through clear and focused energy and thought.  Why? (you may ask)

My reasons why are sound;

I have the knowledge of my power – I continue to grow is ability.

I have the courage to dare – I continue to go forward daringly.

I have the Faith to do what is required to achieve my DMP – As described above.

IF there was nothing else to read this week, that single paragraph would have been completely enough.

I will leave it to a shorter blog this writing.